natsumi4g: (izam)
[personal profile] natsumi4g
I am angry. I am angry about my situation. My situation is having to take care of my mother. My situation is being stuck in Phoenix for the indefinite future.

I am frustrated. I am frustrated because my social security benefits haven't been decided on, and I'm not sure I will get them.

I hurt people. I hurt my mother's feelings. I make her feel bad. I hurt my grandmother. I don't treat her well. I take her for granted and ignore her.

I am attached to the idea that everything should be as I want it. I am attached to the idea that I should never be interrupted or be in a position where I have to interact with others. I am attached to thinking that I don't deserve this life.

Who deserves it? Doesn't this happen to other people, who are much worse off than me?

I am obsessed with objects, the aquiring of things, and I am not satisfied when I get them. I just move on to the next thing, with the added burden of more debt.

I don't want to go on thinking in ways that make me depressed, doing things that only cause me more stress.
From:
Anonymous( )Anonymous This account has disabled anonymous posting.
OpenID( )OpenID You can comment on this post while signed in with an account from many other sites, once you have confirmed your email address. Sign in using OpenID.
User
Account name:
Password:
If you don't have an account you can create one now.
Subject:
HTML doesn't work in the subject.

Message:

 
Notice: This account is set to log the IP addresses of everyone who comments.
Links will be displayed as unclickable URLs to help prevent spam.

Profile

natsumi4g: (Default)
natsumi4g

December 2016

S M T W T F S
    123
45678910
11121314151617
181920 21222324
25262728293031

Most Popular Tags

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags
Page generated Jul. 22nd, 2017 08:42 am
Powered by Dreamwidth Studios